One of the first things to do when planning your wedding is to decide who’s invited. There are many different factors that can influence the size of your guest list such as how many people you can afford to feed, the amount of guests you can squeeze into your ideal venue, whether you want a grand invite-everybody-you’ve-ever-met type affair or a smaller very-close-friends-and family gathering…
Another decision to make is whether certain types of guests should be invited: namely children.
For some of you it may not even cross your mind to not invite children. They are spontaneous, fun and look adorable. If friends have them or family members are children then it may be the natural choice to have them be a part of your wedding.
Kids = catastrophe?
But for others horror stories such as babies crying throughout the wedding video, grubby lil’ fingers on wedding dresses and kids getting to the cake before you have chance to cut it are enough to put a bride and groom off!
Awesome image courtesy of The Image is Found
These couples are faced with the tricky task of how to tell guests that whilst they’d love them to come they don’t want their bundles of pride and joy tagging along!
Definitely a good time to be diplomatic.
Say it with stationery
How you word your wedding invitations lets guests know who’s coming. For a couple with children, reading an invite addressed to Mr & Mrs (minus ‘and family’) is an indication that they need to be finding a babysitter for the night. Although I do think this method is a little vague and sometimes to be safe it may be better to spell it out to your guests.
Perhaps don’t opt for a blunt ‘No children allowed’ or blunter ‘Leave the ankle-biters at home’ though! Instead ‘An adult only affair’ would work. Or something similar to how my best bud Michelle addressed people for her wedding day:
“As much as we love your little bundles of joy; we regret to inform you that we are not inviting children to our wedding. We hope that you will see this as an opportunity to enjoy an adult day, let your hair down and enjoy the party with us!”
This is actually a very good reason to not want children at your wedding. I’m pretty sure that by the time I marry most of my close friends will have had children and I think I’d be a bit upset if the party ended at 9pm because the kids needed putting to bed! It’d be really nice to see your friends and family have a really good time with no worries about how their children are behaving and if they’re bored or tired.
If you are worried that saying it with stationery may offend then you could always ring guests with children and explain it to them over the phone before stationery is sent out. I’m sure they’ll understand and if they don’t then perhaps they shouldn’t be a part of your day. It’s your wedding and it’s important you aren’t pushed into any decisions you don’t want to make.
You may, however, feel too uncomfortable asking parents to leave their children behind despite it being your preferred choice!
So what to do if you want kids at your wedding but also want to make sure they don’t affect the day?
Count on a crèche
A crèche is the perfect solution for adults wanting to have a great time knowing their children are nearby and safe (googling ‘wedding crèche’ offers up loads to choose from). And picking a crèche that meets Ofsted requirements ensures you are leaving the children in the capable hands of trained staff. Crèches also offer all sorts of activities for children to participate in meaning they won’t be bored; they may even have more fun than the adults! And some crèches will even look after the children until the next morning so parents don’t have to leave the party early!
Of course budget is an issue. Having a crèche may be something that you could ask parents (who will be glad to use it) to contribute to. But if it’s simply not an option there are other ways to include children in your wedding and make sure they have a good time. Here’s a few ideas:
Entertaining the kids
- Have the children seated together at your wedding so they have company of a similar age and don’t have to endure hours of adult conversation!
- Arrange with the caterer to have kid-friendly food: burgers, chips and ice cream for example. Fancy wedding food may not go down so well with little ones.
- Let them doodle all over paper tablecloths whilst the meal is taking place:
- Don’t give them the same favour as the rest of your guests. Pick gifts suitable for a child such as small games, sweets and bubbles.
- Or go for a box of entertainment such as those offered by Event Smiles that have boy and girl themed boxes in different age ranges.
- Organise a scavenger hunt of things to find around your reception. These could be items you place yourself, but to give you less to organise (as let’s face it there’s enough already!) you could pick items that are likely to be around such as items from guests (tie, coin, comb) or if outside you could include a stone, flower or leaf.
- Hire an entertainer, such as a magician, who could set up in a corner of your venue and keep children entertained.
- Slightly older children could be given a disposable camera and a list of pictures to take. These could be developed for them and put in a small album as a memory of the wedding they were a part of.
Awesome image courtesy of The Image is Found
Mini memories
Whatever you decide make sure it is your decision and how you imagined your wedding day to be. That’s the most important thing! But do remember, if you don’t have children at your wedding you will be missing out on super-cute memories like these:
Awesome images courtesy of:
Debs
